Press start to skip

Sonic: Hey Chris there's a hijacked plane a west of here and it's being guarded by weird squid-jet-thingies, and I thought you'd like to shoot out the... oh. you.

Chris's mom: *"holy freaking crud"-face and lip quiver*

Chris: Hey mom I'm going out.

Chris's mom: you've been... out... with that... alien from the news...

Chris: Hey, you might wanna get me outta here before she-"

*The mom pulls a gun from the cupboard. Sonic uses magic hands to steal the gun's soul.*

Sonic: Just HANG ON, this guy's good! I once saw him take the mustache off a robber from fifty feet with his M-16. Nothing's gonna happen to him, chillax"

Mom: You take my son to ground zero, and you say 'rela'- M-60? What? Just please don't take him!" *Starts to tear up*

Sonic: Jeez, talk about killing a mood. Okay, wow she needs a hug something major. Umm, She's making me feel uncomfortable. I think she thinks I shouldn't steal children or something."

*loading screen*